Real Estate Porn

Many years ago, I worked for an awesome magazine called THE WEEK. For those of you not familiar with this publication, it is multi-source and multi-perspective, covering everything from domestic and international news to arts & leisure, to health & science to business. Every week, there was the “Hot Properties” spread featuring homes from around the country. There would always be a theme and the homes were always amazing. When I would present the magazine in client meetings, I always referred to this spread, fondly, as “real estate porn.”

Since I have been sheltering-in-place here in Carmel-by-the-Sea, I have had ample opportunity to walk around parts of town that I previously hadn’t explored and drool over all the incredible homes in town. Seriously, the whole town is basically real estate porn and as soon as I fall in love with one home, I find another that’s even more amazing. Anyway, since this is my last post from C-B-T-S, I figured I’d do a rundown on some of the homes currently for sale. Mind you, I am NOT in the market for a home. I don’t think I’d qualify for a mortgage based on my current economic status. But it’s fun to scope out the possibilities…

Oh! And before presenting my top picks, I should clarify the difference between Carmel-by-the-Sea and Carmel. CBTS is an incorporated city – all residences/businesses within the city limits do NOT have addresses and use P.O. Boxes for mail. When trying to find a place, the “address” will be something like Monte Verde Street, 4 NE of 3rd Ave or something to that effect. Carmel is the unincorporated part of Monterey county and the homes do have addresses and mail delivery. And now presenting the coolest homes for sale (the top left pic being my fave):

If none of these homes are to your liking, you can always just buy a nice empty lot right across from the beach for about $8 million:

$8 million but you have to build a house

One of the other things that sets Carmel apart (besides Clint Eastwood having been Mayor) is the tendency for people to “name” their homes. Of course, many of the names reference the water with names like “Sea Quest” and “Sand & Sea.” There’s a home called “Xanadu” and another called “Knockwood” and my mom’s favorite is “White Caps and Night Caps” – it makes me think what I would name my home should I ever have the opportunity to live here. Probably the “Bee Hive” or something to that effect. Anyway, here’s a gallery with some of the best signs I’ve seen over the last couple of weeks:

I was perusing the Real Estate section of the Pine Cone (local newspaper) after I got back from my stroll the other day and saw these massive homes for sale on Pebble Beach in the $20+ million range and I started thinking what it would be like to have that kind of money. And then I thought about Jeff Bezos, who does have that kind of money. I think $25 million to him is like 25 cents to me. It’s an amount so small that you wouldn’t miss if you lost it. Jeff Bezos could give every hourly employee at Amazon and Whole Foods a $10/hr raise and it wouldn’t even make a dent. Scary.

So it occurred to me that I have been remiss in giving you updates on Snug! Juno does not like the beach – he doesn’t even like getting his feet wet. His favorite activites are taking strolls around town, hanging with Tiger and of course chasing squirrels. Here he is doing what he does best:

Snug on the deck looking for squirrels
Juno’s nemesis
Hanging out with Tiger

Snug has been looking pretty scroungy the last week or so. He was supposed to get groomed this week but the groomers are closed. So I gave him a bath yesterday. He wasn’t too happy about it but it made a huge difference. He smells like baby powder now and as you can see, he’s looking pretty delicious.

In other dog news, I saw this on my walk the other day…

Well it’s time to wrap up this post – my friend Gillian is coming over and we’re going to take a socially distant walk together. Good way to wrap up my time here in Carmel. See you back in Oakland!

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